Imagine this scenario, Mary has been running a successful small business for 5 years. She met Joel who has a business in a similar field. He has the same ideals and passion and is really interested in working with Mary to take their businesses to the next level. After a really positive meeting with Mary he asked her to let him know if she’s interested in working together by the following Friday.
Mary always hoped for an opportunity like this, she believes that her knowledge, skills, experience and the work she has done to date are an excellent fit to Joel’s business model, she really got on well with him and knows that he is well respected. However, by the time Friday arrives, she’s created a list of reasons not to go ahead. And by the end of the day, she still hasn’t talked to Joel.
Does this situation sound familiar?
Fear of success is more common than you think, and it can cause us to miss opportunities that come our way in life. When we’re too afraid to take a risk, take a chance on something or move forward with our goals – either consciously or subconsciously – we get stuck in this ‘no man’s land’, finding it hard to move forward or move back.
So I wanted to share my top 5 tips on how I beat my Fear of Success.
- Be positive, surround yourself with positive, motivating people. Negative people sap your energy and your passion.
- Live with Balance Without balance your journey towards success could turn into an obsession. Balance allows you to focus on the things that are important in your life, love, career, family, creativity, spirituality, health & well being etc. When you have those thing in balance then success breeds success.
- Connect to your Authenticity Take time to connect to your purpose, what makes you happy, where do your passions lie? Most of us get so caught up in our busy lives that we forget to take time out to enjoy and savour our lives and listen to that inner voice. A favourite saying of mine is “stop….and smell the roses”. There are so many benefits when you take some time out for you. It only has to be 10 minutes a day but ensure that this time belongs to you.
- Believe in Yourself This is a big one for me. I often forget or lose focus on what I have done, what I have achieved, what I know and focus on what I don’t know. So remember what you have achieved, the goals you have scored, the success you have had in the past, small or large and then create a library of success. This is a file of stories, quotes, ideas that you can read or watch when you have those feelings of self doubt.
- Identify Your Fears The more you can identify your fears, bring them to the surface and face them the more chance you have of changing them. Remember you are not alone and that there are many people can help you to do this. Hypnosis is a wonderful tool to help you through this process. You just have to be willing to change. Email me here or call me on 0407744566 for a confidential chat. It really is only mind over matter!
Want to know more, below is an excerpt from an article by MindTools on the Fear of Success. What it is, how to know if you have it, and what causes it?
“Fear of Success
Psychologist Matina Horner first diagnosed the fear of success in the early 1970s. Her findings, especially as they related to fear of success in women at that time, were incredibly controversial.Since then, however, most scientists and psychologists agree that fear of success exists for both men and women. Fear of success is similar to fear of failure. They have many of the same symptoms, and both fears hold you back from achieving your dreams and goals.
Signs of Fear of Success
The biggest problem for many people is that their fear of success is largely unconscious. They just don’t realize that they’ve been holding themselves back from doing something great.
If you experience the following thoughts or fears, you might have a fear of success on some level:
- You feel guilty about any success you have, no matter how small, because your friends, family, or co-workers haven’t had the same success.
- You don’t tell others about your accomplishments.
- You avoid or procrastinate on big projects, especially projects that could lead to recognition.
- You frequently compromise your own goals or agenda to avoid conflict in a group, or even conflict within your family.
- You self-sabotage your work or dreams by convincing yourself that you’re not good enough to achieve them.
- You feel, subconsciously, that you don’t deserve to enjoy success in your life.
- You believe that if you do achieve success, you won’t be able to sustain it. Eventually you’ll fail, and end up back in a worse place than where you started. So you think, “why bother?”
Causes of Fear of Success
Fear of success has several possible causes:
- We fear what success will bring – for example, loneliness, new enemies, being isolated from our family, longer working hours, or being asked for favours or money.
- We’re afraid that the higher we climb in life, the further we’re going to fall when we make a mistake.
- We fear the added work, responsibilities, or criticism that we’ll face.
- We fear that our relationships will suffer if we become successful. Our friends and family will react with jealousy and cynicism, and we’ll lose the ones we love.
- We fear that accomplishing our goals, and realizing that we have the power to be successful, may actually cause an intense regret that we didn’t act sooner.”
See full article here